Don’t depend on human relationships:

Recently I was reading the book, “The Fight to Flourish” by Jennie Lusko.  There was a chapter where Jennie described how she was struggling and getting upset by her husband, Levi, when he wasn’t giving her everything that she needed in order to thrive.  However, through a night of reading Psalm 73, she realized that she had been depending on her husband as opposed to God to truly fill her in life.  Then came this quote that really struck me and showed me how I tend to view some of my own human relationships.  “I can’t expect my human relationships to be what only my relationship with God can be.” I often do expect my human relationships with people to be everything that I need, and I also can get upset when they aren’t able to give me that exact thing. I often call my mom (and by often, I mean everyday or a few times a day).  While I think that it is great to call my mom for advice, (she may not think so :)) however, when I have a problem such as in my teaching job, I should also look most importantly look to God in prayer.  I should ask for advice from others,  but ultimately find my advice, energy, patience, and care from the Lord.  

I will say that the quote continues with the next sentiment by saying, “God is all we need, yet we’re better and stronger because of the people He has put in our lives.  We just can’t let them take the place only reserved for the King.”  God has blessed us with our human relationships.  God has blessed us with fellow believers that will help us grow as people and become closer to God.  Iron does truly sharpen iron, just as believers need other believers. However, when we start to look to other people as a necessity, or when we start to depend on our relationship with God depending on how we look to others, then we are going too far in the one direction.  There is a fine line between using others to help us grow strong, iron sharpening iron, and depending on them.  

I believe the best way to remember to depend more on God than the people around us is to remember prayer.  I was often reminded of this when I was in youth groups growing up, of who is the first person that you go to when you have a problem.  Do you go to God in prayer and read the Bible while looking for the answers, or do you go to someone around you?  Again, this is where I will say that I often go to my mom or to the people around me.  God has blessed me with wonderful people in my life.  However, I don’t always go to God in prayer when I have problems.  I believe there is a part of me, as much as I don’t always admit, that really doesn’t believe that God can solve all of my problems.  There is, of course, the part of me that knows that God is all powerful, all knowing, all loving, but then I have moments when I don’t know if God can really solve my personal problems.  Either that, or there is a part of me that doesn’t want to give the problem to him because I may want to handle the situation in a sinful and selfish manner.  Sometimes, I may not feel ready to give up the problem to God because that may require me to move past my pain and handle the situation with prayer, grace, forgiveness, and love, when I may want to actually lash out in hate.  I don’t want to admit that, but it is a battle that we continually face. We all have our inner sinful desires we have to fight over.  It is just important that we really do remember to continually keep fighting them.  

Recently I have been struggling with my anxiety over being a speech coach as well as my teaching job.  I have been constantly questioning whether or not I am doing a good job.  I often over analyze every piece of my job and start to really criticize every choice, loss of impatience, or every assignment/punishment that I have to give out.  I often talk to my mom and other teachers about how I am feeling and am seeking advice.  However, the thing that has been really starting to make me feel better and less anxious has been going to the Lord in prayer.  Everyday that I go to school, I try to pray to God that I handle school situations to the best of my ability and in the most loving, Christ like manner, (even if that does yes include punishments). 

I have an example of how I tried to remember this recently.  Granted, this is not me being perfect, but I think it at least shows progress.  Most mornings,  I do my devotional before I go off to school.  While I was about to do my Bible study, I also decided I should maybe check my email.  I read one email and then I was instantly fuming angry.  I did decide to call my mom and vent to her/ask for advice (so yes I still went to her first).  However, since I was still planning on doing my devotional, I spent some of my prayer and journal time discussing my anger and asking for God to help me calm down.  (See, work in progress!)  I learned to go to the Lord when I was upset, and I needed help to calm down and be with me to make the smartest choice moving forward.   (I also learned that one shouldn’t maybe check emails before doing a devotional.  It might distract you from your Jesus time).  The Lord has blessed me with a wonderful relationship with my mother, but she also can’t be my everything and the only one that I go to.  I need to make sure that I am depending on the Lord first and foremost.  

The Lord is so good that he doesn’t want us to be alone, and he wants us to have great relationships.  However, like in all things, there is too much of one good thing, except for the Lord, he is the only thing that we can have too much of.  I personally am going to try to make sure that I look to the Lord first in prayer before then I call my mom or talk to anyone else.  I also am going to challenge the same of you.  Maybe take some time thinking about who you defend on besides the Lord, and then take some steps to realize why you seek that person out before the Lord.