True Repentance:

I have recently finished the book, “Forgive,” by Timothy Keller.  This book has really been a good insight to me on how to feel about forgiving others, as well as how to be overfilled with appreciation and joy from the forgiveness God has shown us.  Through having this deep appreciation over God’s forgiveness, we are able to use that forgiveness to overflow to others. 

This past chapter I read was all about forgiving ourselves or dealing with shame/guilt when we do sin or make a mistake.  I really enjoyed this chapter.  Keller did a good job showcasing to me some of the ways we as people, including myself, can show repentance.  Some of this is true repentance and then some of it is fake repentance.  There may even be times when we believe we are showing true repentance, but instead we are really just trying to make ourselves feel better or get shifted from the blame.  

There are three main ways we as people can show fake repentance and this is through shifting of the blame, self-pity, and lastly, self-flagellation.  Shifting of the blame is when we start to give excuses for the reason we have sinned or made a mistake.  This could be shifting the blame to our upbringing and certain trauma we have experienced, or it could be through shifting the blame to what other people have done.  Keller really showed us that this type of shifting of the blame is not showing repentance and it is not real love for the person you are apologizing to.   

I believe I can often fall into the shifting blame.  I can start to blame my certain attitude or issues on some of the things that are happening around me.  When I am really stressed, I can start to explain the reason why I am not acting like myself.  However, really at the end of the day, I need to just apologize and repent from my sins, accept forgiveness from God and hopefully the other person, and then try to act in a better way for the future. 

Then self-pity is another example of fake or not real repentance and therefore not showing real love.  Self-Pity is when a person cares more about the consequences than they do actually about apologizing. They start to develop a “woe is me” concept.  They can even start to compare themselves to others who do not seem to get as punished, even for a similar crime.   It is important to not fall into self-pity and to not spend time feeling sorry for oneself. 

This last type, if I am honest, is the one in which I struggle the most. This type of repentance is self-flagellation.  This is the idea of self-loathing and cries of feeling awful for who you are as a person.  Essentially, this is calling yourself a really bad person, and eventually hoping there will be someone else to comfort you and tell you that you are not that bad, or the sin that happened wasn’t that bad.  This is to make yourself feel better, or to make yourself feel more self-righteous. 

The quote that really struck me from this description was in “Real Repentance involves an acceptance of God’s free mercy.”  (152).  This means that when we repent to God, we need to be willing to accept the mercy God wants to give us.  We need to realize that part of God’s mercy is that we are not good enough on our own, so God had to send his son to die on the cross for our sins.  

There are times when I really struggle to go on and on about how I feel like a bad person.  There are times when I am genuinely not as happy with myself as I wish I could be.  There are times when I feel as though I have very wrongly sinned and that I am not a very good christian or I am not doing what I need to do.  However, I never took the time to realize that during those moments, I am also looking to be encouraged.  I am looking for someone to tell me the opposite, that I am a good enough person, that I am a good christian, that I am lovable, etc.  

A big part of being a Christian is learning to accept grace and mercy from God.  There is a reason God died on the cross for our sins.  He wanted to make sure to take away all the sins we have done.  He wants us to be forgiven.  He wants us to feel loved and accepted by him once again.  However, in order to really take this acceptance, we do need to believe that we don’t have to keep wailing about how we have sinned.  We need to be willing to accept forgiveness and move on in a better way from that moment on. 

There are many verses throughout the Bible in both the Old and New Testament that speak of the importance of repentance and forgiveness.  Even before the world had the sacrifice of Christ, God was still calling his people to come to Him.  This is from 2 Chronicles 7:14 which says, “If my people who are called by my name humble themselves, and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven and will forgive their sin and heal their land.”  The Lord was calling the people to humble themselves, decide that they can not save themselves on their own, then pray to God and seek him in order to really be forgiven and to be made whole.   There is another verse that I do believe really showcases how God feels about how true repentance needs to be.  2 Corinthians 7:10 says, “For godly grief produces a repentance that leads to salvation without regret, whereas worldly grief produces death.”  There is a certain level of grief that happens when people need to repent.  However, this needs to be a godly grief.  This needs to have the desire to really reach out to God and seek repentance.  This is different from worldly grief, where the person may be looking to be redeemed through their own actions and through their own words.  No challenge for this week, but please keep these thoughts in mind, the next time you are need of true repentance.