Seeing Other’s Perspectives:

I love reading.  I love books.  I love stories.  I love being able to learn something new from the book I am reading, and I love getting to think about something in a new way.  I am a passionate reader though.  I am a reader that wants to, at one time or another, throw my book across the room (I don’t, just an FYI).  I can get so passionate about what others are doing in the story, and I can really become vocal when I believe they are not doing the right thing or are hindering their progress. 

I am currently reading a book about two sisters who are experiencing the grief of their father.  They are both processing this grief in very different ways, and through this they are in many ways, unintentionally hurting one another and many others around them.  As a reader, I am screaming at the book at times because I just want to yell at them, “Why don’t you understand how the other person is feeling?”  It is so obvious.  Then I realized it may not be so obvious to the characters in my book.  They are not reading from another person’s perspective.  They aren’t seeing what the other person is doing when no one else is around.  They aren’t in another character’s mind like I, as the reader, am.  

This realization made me stop and think.  Oh, how I have misjudged other’s perspectives at many different times.  I can’t see from their headspace as much as I can see the characters in my books or my stories.  I need to be better at looking at other’s perspectives to the complete extent. Just because I can’t get into other people’s heads like I can when I am reading, doesn’t mean I can’t seek out their opinion or their thoughts as much as possible.  I shouldn’t just assume I understand everything from where they are sitting.  

I am often a person who can get really frustrated by others.  I have been working on this, but it is still a struggle for me.  One example I am sure many others have experienced is road rage.  There are many times when people can be slower than I would prefer.  However, then I can think of the experiences when I have been confused about where I was going, or maybe it is more slick or there is an issue with the car.  I have been in situations when I did not feel confident driving, and I know I am angering others, yet I can be very quick to become impatient with others when they are driving. I have no idea why they are choosing to be slower.  Maybe it could even be a new driver on the road or they had a flat tire yesterday, or they are not confident on the round-a-bouts, or they are trying not to spill a crockpot full of spaghetti.  (That was an example from my personal life).    

There is a verse that really captures the thoughts we should have when it comes to other’s perspectives.  Philippians 2: 3-4, “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or empty pride, but in humility consider others more important than yourselves. Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others.”  I have brought this verse up many times in blogs, but it still serves as a great reminder to get out of our own heads and focus on other people’s thoughts and what is in their heart.  We can be so focused on our day to day, when we easily forget that we have been called to focus on one another’s lives more than our own.  

I do want to point out that it is perfectly reasonable to get into disagreements.  It isn’t preferable for most people, but it is going to happen to every one of us from time to time.  Sometimes disagreements can really be beneficial because it will help solve issues that may have been hidden before.  It can bring about those different perspectives some people never bothered to think about previously.  I am definitely not suggesting to never bring up your own issue that you may have with something because you are trying to see it from another person’s perspective.  A person can definitely try to look at another person’s perspective before they bring the issue to another’s attention, but then it is perfectly acceptable to speak your thoughts and peace, respectfully.   

My challenge for you this week is to reflect on where you don’t see other people’s perspectives.  This could be in your work environment or class environment, on the road, when talking with your family or friends, or even in a church setting.  There are so many times we as people can disagree with one another.  This week, really try looking from the perspective of the person of whom you may not always get along.  You may learn quite a bit from them.