Being Selfless:

I would love to say that I am a selfless person, and I spend a lot of time thinking about others, but the truth of the matter is that I am often thinking about myself.  I am often thinking about what I can best do to make myself happy and do the things that I really enjoy.   I would say that I can be a thoughtful person, where I am thinking of things that can make others feel better with different kinds of snacks or cards, but when it starts to get really hard and I am really tired, I can often put others feelings away.  I guess another way of saying that is when the going gets tough it is hard for me to think of others.  

Philippians 2:3-4 describes perfectly how to be selfless.  “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves.  Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others” A big piece of these two verses describes that when we love and value others more than ourselves, we are more interested in asking them questions about them and to try to figure out things the things that make them happy and bring them joy.  If anyone knows me, they know that I really love the 5 love languages by Gary Chapman.  I love trying to figure out what kind of love language a person is, so that way I can best love that person.  If they are a person who enjoys getting little cards or gifts (tip-that’s my love language :)) then I want to show love to a person in that way.  

Another verse that the Bible talks about being selfless is Galatians 5:13 which says, “For you, brothers, were called to freedom; but do not use your freedom as an opportunity for the flesh. Rather, serve one another in love. You, my brothers and sisters, were called to be free. But do not use your freedom to indulge the flesh; rather, serve one another humbly in love.”   One should definitely serve and to think of others as more importantly than themselves. The Lord has chosen you to be someone who is free that then works to make others free.  This also goes into a big way of being selfless is through being willing to serve one another.   I know those are the times when it can be the hardest.  It can be hard to spend time thinking about serving one another when our lives seem so chaotic and hard, but it is also in those moments when others truly see God and feel his love.  

Both of these verses also mentioned being humble.  Again, this is because one will struggle to care more about others if they are more focused on themselves.  This can, however, lend itself to the belief that “you are such a good person” and are serving so many others that then you feel as though you are on a pedestal above everyone else.   That can be easy to do, right.  If I am honest, there are times when I have done a lot of good deeds, that I am thinking highly of myself.  This is not being selfless at all, but rather it is just being selfish that looks a bit more selfless.  A person should have the desire of helping or loving the other person without any reward.  When you believe that you deserve better than others, then you are less likely to be selfless towards them.  

The golden rule is another good example of being selfless, and it is actually based on a verse from the Bible and that is from Luke, in 6:31. “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.”  We need to be willing to treat others the way that we would want to be treated.  I have written a blog post about this verse or this command a long time ago.  It was probably one of my very first blog posts where I tried to challenge myself as well as everyone reading that we are supposed to treat people the way that we want to be treated, not necessarily treating them the way that we actually are treated.  We are often not treated by others the way that we want to be treated, through maybe being yelled at, made fun of, or ignored.  

Recently, my mom got me a prayer journal that has one write down a few prayer requests from the day, what they are thankful for, and then one act of kindness that is supposed to be completed within the day.  While at first, this drove me insane, I have found that this was a good way to keep me constantly thinking about what I can do for others.  There would be some days when I would stare at that question for quite a few minutes, and I would think about skipping it.  I don’t know what I can do for someone today, I am already doing so many other different things and am going to be so busy.  However, I have seen how this question has helped me think of others on a regular basis.  This has helped me start to notice the things that people say in regards to needing help or needing some kind of encouragement.   I believe that this is going to be something that I do on a regular basis even after I finish the prayer journal.  This is something that I believe can be beneficial for a lot of people, so I do highly recommend that you think about something you start to adapt in your own personal life.